Thousand followers Yet Alone

With the help of technology we are more connected than ever before, yet we feel more isolated. We have the ability to reconnect with our high-school classmates, yet we feel that we have less intimate connections than the generation before us (even with our near and dear ones). We are surrounded with many people around us. Many friends, well-wishers, family and society, yet we are mentally all alone.

Loneliness has its own definition, different tendency and different effect For Every individual. But the question is why most of us are feeling alone? Why we are not able to get connected? The answer is very simple: Judgmental attitude.

Just think once, if you Speak your heart out with someone, and they immediately make an opinion about you (mostly negative). Would you ever share your heart with anyone? Beside knowing these things, we sometime intentionally want to hurt someone with our attitude, words or actions. Take a moment and look around you? Is there anyone you can share “the real you” with? Without having fear of being judged or labeled. If your answer is yes, you are a blessed person. But what if the answer is no?

There is a sudden wave of thoughts regarding “LONELINES”. We all are defining and rephrasing loneliness. In my view, if there is an unwanted wave in the sea of life, we shouldn’t be focused on that wave ignoring the interminable capabilities of the sea. Just think, why not to focus on the unending sea of life. Few waves can never define the power of sea. A sea full of life and possibility. And yes, we always have solution with us and inside us. This is how we are naturally programed.

And here comes the solution: “ACCEPTANCE”. We have fear of being judged as unlikeable, a loser, or weird Person, so we don't discuss our inner self resulting into the sense of loneliness, alienation, or exclusion.

Power of acceptance:

We cannot change other people. I’ve tried. It doesn’t work. Trying to change others is a simple way to destroy your relationships. How can I like or respect you (or love you!) if you don’t accept me for who I am? Don’t be in a relationship with the goal of changing someone as it will only make that person dislike you. If you keep trying to change someone to serve your needs and desires, you will end up damaging that person’s self-esteem resulting in a void. We should accept everyone the way they are with all the faults and goodness. If we are supposed to enjoy with them in their good times, we should also accept them in their bad times. Love, care and respect should be independent of luck, reputation and money.

When we accept others, we show them true love. We show them that our love isn’t dependent on whether they are meeting our needs. Instead, we love them because we are delighted to have them in our lives, just as they are. If we live with the acceptance we aren’t wasting our invaluable energy in complaining and worrying, which left us free to crack on with life as it came to us.  I realized that non-acceptance is a form of insanity and denial, and a one-way-ticket to anxiety, anger and unhappiness. When we are not accepting the facts of the moment (through complaining, judgement and other forms of narration) this is a disadvantage because we are making complains about something that is already true and existing.  I’m saying it shouldn’t have happened but that has already happened and generally we are no one to decide what happens! Acceptance can transform unpleasant and irritating experiences into pleasant ones. I spoke to an old couple and asked about their long and happy married life. The lady said “initially I wasted golden period of my life to bring changes in him but after long fights and argument we both realized that we lost our happiness because of non-acceptance of each other. The day we accepted each other was the real day we won each other”.

Acceptance is a two way process. If someone is accepting us the way we are then we have to accept them the way they are: without making complaints and pointing out negative traits. Just accept someone with all their good and bad, past and present & better and worse, you will see the difference. Accept all irrespective of their age, psychological traits, preferences, financials and weirdness. It’s a key compound of getting attached to our loved ones. Higher the acceptance higher the chances of getting connected without fear of being judged or labeled. The more we accept someone, the more they will be attached to us. Acceptance is the attitude which changes meaning of getting connected to each other. If you accept someone, it will bring them closer to you. Stronger will be the connections, trust, and love in life.

“If we are not liking the rain, rain drops and a beautiful smell of after rain and we are fixating more on how rain creates mess after it’s gone. Then it’s not going to change the creation (nature) and eventuality of the rain as it’s legitimate and instinctive. Similarly, we can’t change natural behavior of someone with rejection and complains. We won’t get anything in return when we complain, except more reasons to make complains. Surprisingly, if we know and accept the rain (natural behavior), it will help us to accommodate with rain. Life never stops, it goes on and on, doesn’t matte we accept it or not. But acceptance give us strength to fight back, to acclimate and to think rationally.

When we are engage in making complaint, finding negativity and being not happy with whatever we have, you know what happen then? We squander all the opportunity to praise someone, love someone, reasons for happiness and to see positivity around us. It dependence on your personal attitude and preference, if you look up to the sky in night, what would you see? A big dark and empty surface or twinkling star, beauty of moon and creation of nature on colorful canvas, choice is always yours.”

"It’s better to accept than to lose them"